Tapioca Starbucks Lovers That Say That I'm Insane

[joeymichaels]

My therapist is retiring.

We had a session last week. I've been having issues because my parents are thinking of selling the family house. They're doing it for a reason I support - they're both in their 70's and managing a huge house and big yard is becoming a serious burden for them, especially after a hard burden like this year.

Anyhow, I spent a couple of days periodically bursting into sobs over this and then thought I had it under control.

A few days later though, everything seemed fine and suddenly, as I was driving, I thought "say, why not drive into that wall right there and kill yourself?"

"Gosh, brain, that sounds like a good idea. Let's do that."

So I started speeding up.

This dude comes jogging around the corner with his dog and I think "DOG!" and slow down and then eventually stop and pull over and hyperventilate for a while.

Anyhow, next time I'm with my therapist, she points out that all of my incidents have been in response to losses or (in this case) future losses.

Then she apologizes and tells me she's retiring end of next month.

Well ain't that a how'd ya do?

The thing is, I didn't really want to kill myself, but at the moment it just seemed to make perfect sense. So, yeah, what is going on with you, brain?

I don't know who my new therapist will be, but I'd best start looking. Sigh.

Comments

[theafaye.livejournal.com]

Who says the universe doesn't have a sense of irony?

I don't really have anything useful to say other than if you ever need someone to sound off at, you have my email.

[avecvu.livejournal.com]

Joey. <3

This all suuuuuuuucks. Given this most recent winter, I completely get where your parents are coming from, but it's obviously still a loss. And losing your therapist is terrible... after my doctor left, I never really settled in with a new therapist. It's hard. It sucks so much.

See if your current therapist can hook you up with somebody. She should be able to refer you to somebody you'll get along with... it is a real struggle to basically audition new therapists, because you're putting it all out there for somebody who you might not click with. And it's like starting from square one. Your current therapist might be able to help you avoid that tedious process.

In the meantime, if you ever need me, I am here.

[adoptedwriter.livejournal.com]

My hub felt real bad when his parents sold his childhood home too. It's rough because it's a part of you, even if it's logically good for them. Hugs.
Loss sucks.
AW

[phaedie.livejournal.com]

I hear you about the house, my parents should sell theirs but won't and I wish they eould but don't.
ALWAYS visualize that dog when driving instead of listening to your brain.
Ask your shrink for help finding a new one and explain what you are looking for.
You made me bes bossy. :(